The artist has a (albeit kind of stiff) English translation on his twitter, which I've copied over with minor adjustments to this post. Hopefully that works out.
You're also saying that you're forever 17!?
The artist included a link to an actress famous for saying the same thing. The 「おいおい。。。」 Roman says two panels up may be a reference to a common fan reaction to that actress.Wha! What! Did you use your real name for a forgery?This will do!She is forging a student visa.Hmm...Eighteen and Life
